On Being Wrong

During my 31 27 Days of Reading Well, I made a big old stinking deal about the book The Saving Graces by Patricia Gaffney. It's so good! I said. I cry every time! The characters are so real!

Well, apparently there's something to be said about reading books in different phases of life. According to Laura, Catcher in the Rye is extremely poignant if you read it at the right stage. (I didn't read it until after college and found it rambling and ridiculous.) I didn't read Wuthering Heights until I was well along in my English major, and I adored it, while I know many who read it in high school found it abysmal.

I don't think I had actually read The Saving Graces since early on in our marriage. The summer before we got married, my daddy's best friend died from liver cancer at age 50 ... and looking back, I think perhaps that affected my reading of the book more than anything.

At 29, I've struggled with infertility. I am married with two kids. I've held a job, I've wanted to be a writer, I've gone through some deep depressions. I might have too much in common with some of the characters now.

I was eager to reread my battered copy after I wrote about it this October. But in those water-stained and creased pages I found none of that original emotion. I shed no tears. I felt no real pull to the characters.

Too far away from a cancer experience? Too long without intimate women friendships? I don't know.

I hate to recant my statements but in this case ... I wouldn't want anyone to buy the book, read it, and think I was nuts. Compared to most else of what I recommend to you, it's just not my cup of tea anymore.

I think reading tastes change ... and I think that is OK.

Are there any books that have led you to say, "What was I thinking?"

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Saturday Linky Love

For starters, I need to apologize. I just lost steam on my 31 Days series and this week is very full for our family: two birthdays, in-law visits, parents' weekend at the school, Halloween parties, birthday parties ... I just don't think I am making it past 26 days! I hope y'all enjoyed the reading posts and I am planning on one more post for Monday.

And with that said, here are some links I visited and loved recently:

• Stop the Spin Cycle at Inspired to Action
• Tiger Mothers? Or the Making of Velveteen Mothers at (in)courage
• 5 Fall Tree Crafts for Kids at 4tunate
• Jalapeno Popper Dip at Giving Up on Perfect
• Mark My Place at Mylestones

Added to Saturday Stumbles at Simply Staci.

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 26

The Books That Changed Them

I recently read The Book That Changed My Life. No, really. That's the title! It's an excellent collection of essays from writers ranging from Anne Lamott to John McCain to Frank McCourt. All share a book (or few books, for those who are like me and can't make up their minds) that changed them.

It's been sitting on my shelf for probably two years. I stocked up on books when I started using PaperBackSwap and as a result have spent the last year trying not to acquire any new books while I read the 200+ that I have. But now that I've read it, I'm sad I waited so long. As someone who loves chatting about books more than most things in life, reading this was like sitting down with a group of good friends and finding out their very favorite books of all time.

(Although I'm not sure I trust anyone whose life was changed by Catcher in the Rye. I just don't get it, I guess.)

The Books That Changed My Life

I can't pick one. Are you surprised? I would guess not if you've read any of my posts about books. But I can narrow them down to two: one that changed my reading and one that changed my writing.

I've waxed poetic about A Prayer for Owen Meany by John Irving before (see this post). I first read it for a creative writing class in high school--by far the best gift I received from that particular teacher. I had never been presented with a novel so intricate, one that was so incredibly thought-out.

I don't know if Irving writes with such a detailed outline that he knows each and every event that will happen (Bird by Bird refutes that this actually happens, but I still wonder!), or that he goes back and tinkers with precision once he has determined his characters' paths, but either way this book has such a sophisticated road to the end it takes my breath away. Above all else, it caused me to think about what I am writing and not just blab on in train-of-thought--although we all know I do that some too.

The book that changed my reading is One Hundred Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez. I was in a 200 level English class entitled Great Novels with the lovely Susan Heroy. I was flip-flopping around about my major, having discovered that I would need more than a summer study abroad to obtain an International Studies major and not really wanting to go that route. Opening Garcia's masterpiece led me on a wild goose chase. I scribbled in the book. I asked questions of my professor. I was fascinated by his use of mysticism, smells, colors.

Shortly after I closed the text, I decided to declare a major in English despite not having one class toward the major. I wanted to read more books like One Hundred Years of Solitude. I wanted to spend my time talking about them and writing about them with the hopes that one day I would write my own.

So I did.

Maybe some day I'll finish that book I'm writing.

Is there a book that's changed your life?

Originally published in January 2010.

See the books the authors recommended: Part I and Part II.

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 25

I have a small confession: I am a comfort reader. Whenever I am in an emotional mess, I turn to familiar books and read myself through the crisis. My favorite comfort-reading books are Echoes by Maeve Binchy, the Harry Potter books, Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood by Rebecca Wells, and the Glenbrooke series. 

My very ultimate comfort read, though? A short children's chapter book called The Attic Mice.

Aren't the illustrations charming? They were done by David Catrow, who has illustrated many books. These sketches are very unlike his newer illustrations, but were perfect for the antiquated charm of Ethel Pochowski's short book.

From the precious Robert Southey poem used as an epithet to the mice performing a Christmas pageant in their spacious attic home, The Attic Mice is enchanting, delicious, and the perfect read-aloud.

But this book is a thousand times more special to me than just its contents. My uncle's ex-wife, a children's librarian and elementary-school teacher, gifted me the tome when I was in its correct age range. She always gave books, and they were always ones I'd never heard of but loved passionately.

I was in college when she and my uncle divorced; it broke me a little, because I hadn't known it was coming at all. Any divorces on either side of my family had taken place before I was could remember them. All of my grandparents were living. This was the first time I was losing a family member, and I couldn't do a thing about it.

Perhaps it was just the point in time, my junior year of college, where I was cramming in as many English major courses as possible while my best friend and confidant was studying abroad in England.

Either way, I grieved their relationship and my loss. And my sweet boyfriend, also known as Mr. V, just didn't know what to do. Finally, I figured out a way he could help.

He read me The Attic Mice, out loud.

It was perfect and healing. It helped.

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 23

A Short Ode to Robin Jones Gunn

Is there an author that always manages to touch your heart, no matter what she or he writes?

That's how I feel about Robin Jones Gunn.

I was really too old for them when I started reading the Christy Miller series. I think I was probably in college. It's a 12-book series of skinny volumes; I could read the whole series in a day now. We follow Christy through her teenaged years, as she moves from Wisconsin to California, through the ins and outs of her (mild) teen angst, relationships, and love for God.

Sometimes a little too perfect, Christy still deals with all the normal aspects of being a teen: fighting with her parents, getting a part-time job, unrequited love, troubles with her friends.

Gunn really captures the essence of a teenager who grew up in the church but didn't really know Jesus until she was older. Through the series, the central plot is God's wooing of Christy and how that plays into her life.

After I read the Christy books, I immediately jumped in the Glenbrooke series, which is Christy for grown-ups. Real women, real problems, lots of romance with many different angles. Yes, they are romance books, but still the main point is about healing your relationship with God above all else.

It's what makes Robin Jones Gunn just a little bit different. Her books aren't just fluffy romance with a little church thrown in, like many Christian fiction books are. It's obvious that her heart is to bring women of all ages closer to their Heavenly Father.

I'll confess I find the Sisterchicks books a little more cheesy, but still something draws me to read everything Gunn writes. The Katie books, a spin-off involving Christy's best friend, are pure fun and a delight to read. The Sierra books offer another look at Christy's group of friends and a younger teen's thoughts. (And I know Gunn has even written a children's series, although I haven't read any of those yet!)

Don't you love it when your favorite author has a zillion books to read? It's so convenient.

Who's your favorite author?

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Journeys, Thailand, and Me

{31 Days of Reading Well: Day 21}

originally posted November 18, 2008, hence the references to my newborn Libbie!

Despite having a newborn, I have had some time to read. I've finished three books since she's been born. I reread Tam Lin by Pamela Dean, read Chicken Soup for the New Mom's Soul, and just finished tonight Tales of a Female Nomad by Rita Golden Gelman.

I liked them all in their own respect - I haven't read a Chicken Soup book since high school, but someone gave this to me and it was sweet and a good reminder to savor every moment. Tam Lin is a little strange but a good read. But I adored the Gelman memoir.

After a bitter divorce, Gelman decides to sell everything and live as a nomad, with no permanent home. She writes of her travels around the world, including an extensive stay in Indonesia. But tonight, near the end of the book, she finally landed in Thailand, and it strummed up such good memories for me.

If you are new to my blog or don't know me, in March 2006 I went to Thailand for two weeks with a group of Tennessee Baptists to help with tsunami relief as a part of an extended effort there. It was a phenomenal experience that I wouldn't trade for anything. I made some good friends that I still keep in touch with. I met amazing and kind Thai people, painted their homes, spoke with national Thai Christians. And the food. It kills me to eat in a Thai restaurant here because the food is nowhere near as good as real Thai food. This passage in the book struck me especially:

"Lawn," says Nark, holding a bowl of red sauce and adding some to his bowl. Then, in English, he says, "Hot. Thai like hot."

"I do too," I respond, spooning about the same amount into my soup along with marinated chilies and assorted leaves. I feel the heat on my lips, my throat, and all the way down. It is hotter than anything they serve in the U.S., but I'm determined to eat Thai food the Thai way. I only choke a little.

I learned quite quickly that if a Thai person says something is a little hot, I should stay FAR AWAY from it. I am extremely sensitive to spicy foods. I even packed my bags with tons of trail mix and snacks in case I couldn't eat anything in Thailand without being sick. But the food was phenomenal. We helped cook our own breakfasts and dinners at our guesthouse, but lunch was cooked by the wife of a local squid farmer in authentic Thai-style. You haven't tasted squid until it is fresh out of the ocean! And those chicken feet really add flavor to a soup.

I wonder sometimes if I will ever travel again like I have; I've been to China, Brazil, Thailand, the Dominican Republic. I love doing short-term missions and interacting with other cultures. I was a Chinese minor in college, and I know my language skills have gone down the tube. I long to be able to practice them again. But now I've entered this new phase as a mom. I'm excited right now to get to leave the house two days in a row.

It's a new adventure. Where we don't quite speak the same language, and this little one will have to adapt to my culture!

When I looked this up on Amazon in 2011, I saw there's now a sequel - Female Nomads and Friends: Breaking Free and Breaking Bread Around the World. Guess that's another book for my TBR list!

See all of the 31 Days of Reading Well posts.

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Children's Books That Make Me Cringe

{31 Days of Reading Well: Day 20}

I'm feeling a little bit snarky tonight, so I am going to tell you about some children's books I don't love. There are so many wonderful books for kids ... but some of them are just off! Even books I loved as a child I now wonder what on earth my parents were thinking when they purchased these gems.

The Piggy in the Puddle was a favorite of mine - a Weekly Reader copy. (Anyone else remember Weekly Reader?) I seriously loved this book enough that I hung onto my copy (or, well, my parents did) until I had my own child to read it to. We read it about three times, enough for me to get upset that that stinking piggy in the bonnet is rude to her parents, disobedient, and uses words I don't want my kids to use! It went to Goodwill. Sorry, pig.

I know this might be slightly controversial, but I kind of hate the book God Gave Us You. I have absolutely zero problems with the text of the book, really. My issue is the animals. THEY ARE POLAR BEARS THAT GO GET ULTRASOUNDS AT THE HOSPITAL. But they also hang out in the woods with fish and stuff. I am OK with animals that act like humans. Or animals that act like animals. But these hybrid polar bears freak me out. Sorry.

I'm really sorry if I'm breaking anyone's heart, but I go to great lengths to AVOID reading The Little Engine That Could. It is a boring book with a whole lot of words, and it is deceptively long. Yes, it has a great moral lesson or whatever. But we can learn that "we can" from a better book. (Also, Mr. V noticed the other night that the book is also sexist: the evil trains are all "he" and the good ones are "she.")

I don't reeeeallly hate Fox in Socks ... but I do think Dr. Seuss probably had a good laugh picturing parents trying to read all these tongue-twisters in a cheerful, good-night book voice. Now I know why we didn't have this book when I was a kid. And why it was in Goodwill in the first place. That parent was wiser than I.

Which kids' books do you secretly (or not-so-secretly) hate?

Since Jill has a sense of humor, I'm linking up these books I DON'T love to her Things I Love Thursday carnival.

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 19

The To-Be-Read List, via Pinterest

Source: amazon.com via Vanderbilt Wife on Pinterest

The more I read ... the more I realize that Charlotte's Web is the perfect book. Seriously. I think this would be super interesting to me!

Source: amazon.com via Vanderbilt Wife on Pinterest

When I was researching and talking about epistolary novels, this one kept coming up. I've heard it's great, and I am feeling the need to read it.

Source: amazon.com via Vanderbilt Wife on Pinterest

I finished the first book of this two-book series last week, and it's one where I really just want to jump in and read the second! The main character was charming, the story fun, and I like Walker's writing. (I've read several of her others fiction books.) Sadly, neither our public library nor the school library has it, so I'm trying to determine how I should procure this one.

What's at the top of your to-be-read list?

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Books to Start Conversations about Jesus and Faith with Your Young Kids

{31 Days of Reading Well: Day 18}

It gripped me this year as school began that I only had three years left with Libbie truly under my wings; she will be almost 6 by the time she goes to kindergarten but still, it doesn't seem long enough! We love reading together and I try to make a point of choosing some books that open spiritual conversations with her. 

Here are seven that I love (including some series, so really, a lot more!) and three that I think I would love.

1. Gigi, God's Little Princess series (and I would assume Will, God's Mighty Warrior series as well) - I love the OH SO PINK illustrations in the Gigi books as well as the message. Mr. V tells Libbie every night now, "Good night, princess. Sweet dreams." I just love Sheila Walsh's sense of humor that makes these books readable for parents, too.

2. The Parable of the Lily by Liz Curtis Higgs - A recommendation from Amanda (as MANY of these have been!), this book is an Easter parable by prolific author Higgs (see my review of Mine Is the Night here).  A daughter is given a gift that she finds pretty worthless: a flower bulb in a crate of dirt. But she finds out maybe it was the most beautiful gift of all.

3. Miss Fannie's Hat by Jan Karon - Yes, I linked to my post about this yesterday. It still needed to go here! More pink, more fun, great Bible verse to memorize, wonderful lesson about giving.

4. Just Like Jesus Said series by Melody Carlson - Melody Carlson is another author who writes for children, teens, and adults. This set of four books convey stories in rhyme and help teach basic Bible lessons: sharing, caring, giving.

5. My ABC Bible Verses by Susan Hunt - We haven't been real methodical about this book yet, especially since the stories are longer with only one picture. Plus, the Bible verses are in KJV. But it teaches practical lessons and I like the idea of doing letter Bible verses! (And we're going to do these alphabet Scripture cards from I Can Teach My Child, definitely!)

6. Jesus Storybook Bible - Sometimes I wish that EVERY Bible story were in this wonderful Bible. But otherwise, it's pretty perfect. Every single story points to Jesus and His salvation of the world. Stories are usually three to four pages long, perfect for bedtime. And having Libbie come up to me and say, "Will you read me the Bible?" is just ... perfect!

7. God Thinks You're Wonderful by Max Lucado - Libbie has yet to sit through this entire book, but it's a sweet concept and I am sure she will with a few more months. It's so Lucado - the line about "if God had a refrigerator, He would hang your picture on it" just makes me smile!

I'm sure I will think of a zillion other books as soon as I hit publish, but that's all I can think of for now ... but here are three more I haven't read but think would be great:

8. Humphrey's First Christmas by Carol Heyer

9. What Is Easter? by Michelle Medlock Adams

10. Heaven, God's Promise for Me by Anne Graham Lotz

What are your favorite Christ-centered books to read to your kids?

Linked up to Top Ten Tuesday at OhAmanda & Best of 31 Days.


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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 17

Today I want to tell you about one of my favorite children's books, Miss Fannie's Hat. But ... you're going to have to go visit Impress Your Kids to hear about it! 

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 16

It thrills me to find new authors that I love. It's so fun to discover a new-to-me author and start devouring his or her books. All the better if they already have many published.

I was in China for six weeks in 2002, after my sophomore year of college. I was in a study abroad program where we went to class for a half a day and then had the rest of the time for exploring. Sure, we had lots of activities to do, lots of area of Beijing to traverse. But we weren't in the most central part of Beijing; we had to hire a cab to go anywhere and then try to give directions in Mandarin; and, honestly, it was thirteen trillion degrees outside and six thousand percent humidity.

I brought a few books with me (The Saving Graces, I remember, which I read at least twice during that time) but zoomed through them with the abundance of free time we seemed to have. So we made what seemed to be a pilgrimage to the English bookstore.

English books are expensive in China. The book I bought was probably the single most expensive thing I procured while in the country. And it was a copy of Tara Road by Maeve Binchy.

I didn't know Maeve Binchy was Irish, or that she had written a lot of books. I didn't know Tara Road was an Oprah book club pick. All I knew was that it was the longest book there that looked readable to me.

It still makes me laugh, a little, to think that I was trying to find a lengthy tome to occupy my time ... in China. And that in a bookstore brim-full with American authors I managed to find a book written and set in Ireland. But I am so glad that I picked up that particular novel, because in it I found a new favorite author.

Tara Road is not my favorite of Binchy's novels, by far. But it holds a dear place in my heart and I won't be letting go of my China copy anytime soon.

[Want to hear more about my China adventure? You might like Why I Studied Chinese, Souvenirs, or Chinese Fairytale.]

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31 Days of Reading Well: Day 15

To get inspiration for these posts, I've often scrolled through the list of books I've read (either here on this blog, or a more comprehensive list on Paperbackswap). One that popped out to me tonight was The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society.  It's an excellent book combining history, romance, a strong and clear female main character, and lovable minor characters.

(From now on it will be known as GLPPS, because the endearingly long title is a little much to write again and again.)

GLPPS is also an epistolary novel.

You might recognize the beginning of the word epistolary; Paul's writings in the Bible are the epistles. The Latin word epistola means "letter, dispatch, written communication." Set in 1946, GLPPS is written entirely in letters. The main character, a young writer and journalist, writes back and forth with her editor, friends, and the members of a literary society on Guernsey island.

It's all fiction; and yet, somehow, the letters seem almost real, perhaps make the story that much more believable. It gives you the sense the narrator is not even there. It's just you, the reader, and the characters, working through the story together. It's intense. Reading a collection of letters in a book is so close to coming across your grandparents' love letters in a box and becoming emerged in their story. It can be very real.

Epistolary novels are certainly nothing new, although now they may include texts, e-mails, or instant-message conversations. I can think of a wide range of books I've read using written communication, sporadically or throughout, from chicklit to Christian fiction to Libbie's toddler books.

I'll never forget hearing someone in my creative nonfiction class read an essay about Memoirs of a Geisha. It was something about being duped by the author because he sets it up that the book is based on a "series of interviews" with a real geisha. And it's not. While Arthur Golden did do extensive research on Japanese culture and the lives of geishas, his book was not the story of a real geisha.

I had read the whole book under the impression that the main character had lived. I might have gone home and cried.

But I believe the author used the same idea behind an epistolary novel: he takes himself out of the picture as much as possible. It can be an extremely effective tactic.

I'm interested by the lists I'm finding of classic and modern epistolary novels; many I have heard of, but not read. They include The Screwtape Letters, Ella Minnow Pea, Dracula (which I have read), and Clarissa, the longest novel in the English language. That's a lot of letters!

So, I find the technique of adding "real-life elements" to novels to be sometimes convincing, sometimes a little too deceptive and emotionally manipulative. What do you think? Do you have a favorite epistolary novel or one that uses letters, e-mails, or other written material?

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