Bliss, Like a Dream

Disclaimer: Amazon affiliate links included in this post. Although I paid my entire way to Blissdom (including the $58 parking), the conference did have wonderful sponsors and we received a lot of free gifts from them.

Why like a dream? Because I was a walking zombie for much of the weekend. I don't survive well on very little sleep, but being with my roommates Hillary and Mary there was simply too much to talk about to sleep. (Like when I pounced on Mary's bed and demanded we talk about Gilmore Girls Season 6 at 1 a.m.)

Me and Mary (Giving Up on Perfect), picture by Christine

My weekend started out in good Jessie fashion: I drove from Chattanooga in the dark and pouring rain; refused to spend money to valet park and thus drug my giant suitcase into the enormous Opryland Hotel; and then could not for the life of me find where anyone else was in the building. (Dear Opryland: Your maps are not good enough.) 

I ended up in the Delta area by the riverboat dock with my gargantuan suitcase and near tears. Happily, Mary and Hillary came and found me and took me to our room. I didn't get to see anyone else that night (Thursday) but it didn't matter. I was with my Blissdom girls!

If I continue in this minute-by-minute fashion, this post is going to be 100 years long. So let's just hit some highlights:

1. Meeting Mary for the first time in person. We've become great friends through blogging and it was incredible to get to see each other face-to-face and yak our heads off.

2. Getting to hold and snuggle Tessa (Tricia's daughter) for long periods of time. I love infant smell. She is adorable and I can't wait to see pictures of her in all of Libbie's hand-me-downs!

3. The opening session by Kevin Carroll. He was simply amazing, inspiring, and adorable. Thanks for coming and sharing with a big bunch of gals, Kevin! [You can buy his Red Rubber Ball book here--I'll definitely at least be finding it in the library!]

4. Savvy Blogging on Friday night. I think I'm going to have to do a separate post on Savvy Blogging and its takeaways, but suffice to say I got to sit at a table and talk with Crystal from MoneySavingMom, one of the founders of The Blog Frog, and several other amazing bloggers for an hour or two. I got a veritable wealth of information--and a great stash of swag from Cracker Barrel, Born Free, RedPlum, Savings.com, and lots of other places! Thanks, sponsors! [Here's a picture of me at Savvy Blogging. I look slightly overwhelmed.]

So you know, the Savvy Blogging site and the Twitter hashtag #savvyblogging are still active and wonderful for asking questions about your blogging.

5. Dinner at Baja Burrito Saturday night. On, oh, Tuesday night, my roomies and I decided to throw together an impromptu Saturday night dinner at my very favorite place in Nashville. Although it was a little harried getting there, we had a great group of ladies, excellent food, and I so enjoyed talking to Cailie, Kim and Kris, Ashleigh, and Krista.

6. Eating at Pancake Pantry with Mary, Hillary, and Jo-Lynne. We were supposed to eat with Amanda and her sisterchicks, but someone's roommates were a little slow getting ready (cough, cough, and I totally wasn't still asleep at 8).

7. Stories. I love hearing people's stories. Even though I was so tired of talking to people I thought I might die on Friday night (introvert much?), I loved talking to each and every one of them!

8. All of this:



Amy from The Finer Things in Life and OhAmanda



Me and Kate from Cooking During Stolen Moments



Hillary (The Other Mama) makes me laugh

Me and Laura from Hollywood Housewife, photo by Mary

I am sure I have 8,000 more things to say but ... I am tired, I have the BlissSnot from shaking 400 ladies' hands, and I need to watch The Office. Just keeping it real. ;)


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DISQUS

As you might be able to see, I've decided to go back to regular Blogger comments. The feedback I've received is that DISQUS is hard to sign into, although it's great on the back end for responding to comments.

Unfortunately I think that means I've lost all the comments AND the ability to receive comments on my last 4 posts! Oh no! I'm so sorry. I appreciate your comments on the post about my grandmother so much.

What would be REALLY helpful though is going to your Blogger profile and changing it so your e-mail is shown and I can e-mail you back in response to your comments. No one who sees your comment will see your e-mail. Create one just for blog comments, if you want!

All you have to do is go to Blogger.com, click on "edit my profile," and then check the box for "show my e-mail address." PLEASE? Cause when you ask me questions I can't respond to, I feel so awful! But if I don't have your e-mail address and you don't come back to look at my response in the comments here, there's no way for me to find you!

I have lots of great feedback from Blissdom to share with you and I can't wait to do that this week!

Picture of the lovely Jo-Lynne at Blissdom from Dawn at My Home Sweet Home

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A Letter from Libbie

Dear Mom,

You didn't just think I'd let you leave without pulling some tricks out of my onesie sleeve, did you? No way!

Tactic 1: Try to cut four teeth at once. Whine incessantly. Gnaw at everything within sight. Then start running a fever so you feel sorry for being annoyed with me.

Tactic 2: Sleep for 13 1/2 hours and coo happily to get you to come get me. Play contentedly and give you lots of hugs so you will be sure to love me too much to leave.

Tactic 3: Pull out EACH AND EVERY ONE of my toys so you will spend all your time frantically trying to pick them back up before Grandma gets here. I'm positive you will collapse in an exhausted heap on the couch and forget to leave.

Wait, Grandma is coming?? That means I'll be held all the time, get to eat all the sugar I want, and never have to go to bed! Bye Mom!! Take your time! Have fun with the blogging ladies!

Love,
Libbie


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Blissdom Fashion, Part II

My number one Blissdom concern? Not being able to find the people I want to meet!

I know, it seems silly. I am there to learn and yada yada. We all know that really, it's a great chance to meet all those people I read every day!

I still can't believe how many people I didn't get to meet last year. I was in such a fog of fever and breastfeeding and newness that I simply didn't connect like I should have. I did get to meet a lot of wonderful women, but knowing now that Jen and Sarah and Mary were all there and I didn't even say hi to them just eats me up inside!

So, here you go:

This is what I'll be wearing on Friday and to Savvy Blogging. Surely you won't be able to miss me if you want to meet me! (Only I might actually do my hair and wear make-up. Maybe.)

I'll be wearing this sweater and jeans on Saturday:

(They're not dirty...just my camera flash. Argh.)

And this on Sunday to Amanda's Pancake Pantry meet-up and to drive home:

P.S. If you are planning on coming to the Pantry--it is ALWAYS absolutely freezing cold. Wear something warm. And the coffee is not very good, so hit up Fido or Provence nearby if you want a good cup.

I'm not faking it here--I am no fashion diva. I'm totally a jeans girl. And yes, this is my same beloved $5 red cardigan. And my bleach-stained jeans.

So will I be able to find you if I want to meet you?

Maybe I should just wear this hat from my Twitter picture and gravatar. Jen from Beauty and Bedlam was worried she wouldn't be able to find people if they didn't look like their Twitter pics!

 

Um, yeah. Think not. I look like a bank robber. ;)

Linked up to Mom's Travel Tales Blissdom Wardrobe Linky
For Part I of Blissdom Fashion, Go Here.
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The Requisite Blissdom Fashion Post

On my last post Leisa commented that she wished everyone were not so concerned with what they're wearing to Blissdom--or other conferences/events.

I guess it's something I continually struggle with. I want not to care what I wear, because after all, what does it really matter? But then I also don't want to feel like a fat slob. I want to take care of myself for my husband and for my own self-confidence. I want to look put-together so my husband is proud that I am his wife.

So then I want nice clothes. I want to be on What Not to Wear so I can have Clinton and Stacy dress me from expensive boutiques and have garments that won't fall apart after I wear them three times.

And then I feel guilty for wanting. And I think how it shouldn't matter.

When I wonder about these things, I try to go back to the Bible. Miss Proverbs 31, an excellent model for women, clothed her household "in scarlet" and herself "in fine linen and purple." I would take that to mean they were dressed well. It is obvious, however, than her clothing was not her main concern: she worked hard making linen, selling it, planting a vineyard, making food for her family, and taking care of the poor and needy.

Last year I was slightly obsessive about what to wear to this conference. You know what happened? Once I was there, I really didn't care what I--or anyone else--was wearing. I bought a dress to wear to the cocktail party and was so feverish and tired of lugging around Libbie that I didn't go and thus didn't wear it (don't worry, I've gotten good use out of it since then!).

I think we notice the "oh my goodness what will I wear" about these conferences so much because of the 500 women attending who are all on Twitter asking about it. I would say they're probably no more worried about what to wear to this than they are about what to wear to any occasion where they will meet new people and want to feel confident. And with social media it's super easy to reach out to other women who are worrying about the same issue and collaborate.

All of that to say, I did buy a few new items. Because I needed them anyway and I want to feel comfortable and confident. I am SUCH an internal person and big crowds of people I don't know scare me half to death. I need every ounce of confidence I can muster! And yes, I do think looking nice helps that.

So while I don't think we should be stressing out any more than normal about our attire, I do understand where it's coming from. Jo-Lynne has some great, practical advice on conference fashion if you're looking for those specifics.

While we're talking Blissdom, can I tell you HOW excited I am to meet these amazing bloggers for the first time? If you're looking for a good read, check them out!

Jen from Balancing Beauty and Bedlam
Mary from Giving Up on Perfect
Laura from Hollywood Housewife
Sarah from Real Life
Jill from The Diaper Diaries
Amy from The Finer Things in Life
Crystal from Money Saving Mom
Liz from Hoosier Homemade
Kristina from Tennessee Locavore 
Kate from A Simple Walk / Cooking During Stolen Moments
Mandi at It's Come to This


If you're going and I haven't met you yet, leave me a comment and let me know!

(Added to Your Life, Your Blog for 1/24)

Have a Blissdom post you've writen? Link it up to this Blog Hop!

Goals for 2010

I'm going to this wild little thing called Savvy Blogging in a few weeks during the Blissdom Conference.

They are hosting a link-up Monday for posts about blogging goals for 2010, since the meet-up is supposed to be a roundtable discussion about blogging as a business.

Here's what they wrote about it:

For many of us, blogging started as a hobby and over time turned into a part-time or even full time business. The problem is that many of us still blog as if it were a hobby. Everyone knows that Apple or  Google would not be the successful companies they are today without setting goals each year.

I had something written here that was fairly negative and I decided to remove it. I don't want to scoff at my potential as a blogger. I certainly never though I would have many readers, that I would make one dime, or that I would have the wonderful friendships that have been made as a result of blogging.

Colossians 3:23 says, "Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men" (NIV). I fully believe this blog is part of "whatever"! It is something I work at, after all. And so my main goal will always be that it is pleasing to Him. For me, that means I live life for Him and serve my family. If I can blog about it and perhaps help contribute to my family, like the Proverbs 31 woman, that is awesome.

Some other, more concrete goals I have?

Create a mission statement for Vanderbilt Wife and keep my posts within that thesis.

I would love to switch to Wordpress sometime this year. Mostly I dislike the Blogger commenting system, and I am not a fan of their new interface. I've been hesitant to do this because of time, cost, and a learning curve, but I think I am at the point where it could happen sooner rather than later.

Interact more with my readers and comment more on their blogs. That kind of has to do with the above and is the reason I dislike Blogger commenting. E-mail is not required so there are many, MANY times I've composed an e-mail back to someone who commented to find that I don't have an e-mail address for them. I LOVE the commenting system that Amy has, where she can respond to the comment on the blog and it automatically sends the commenter an e-mail as well.


Not make the blog my life. I am starting out this year with a big transition to being a work-at-home/stay-at-home mom, and I need to be there for my daughter first and foremost. That is so much more important to me than being a household name or making money.

Spend time actually reading sites like Problogger and Copyblogger so I can learn some good stuff. :)

Edit and reread my posts more thoroughly before I hit "publish."

Index my recipes.

Be willing to change if need be.

Honestly, I want this site to fulfill my goal of writing better as well as be helpful and fun for my readers. What can I do to make it better? You probably know better than I do!

Blissdom Babies

I love this picture from Blissdom taken by Secret Agent Mama (and used with her permission). It's me, Jordana, and Amanda and our little ones. I feel like I spent half of Blissdom sitting on this couch.

I want to thank y'all who have come to visit my little Internet space here since Blissdom! I love to write and it makes me feel blessed that people are interested in reading my musings here. Know I try to visit everyone's blog who comments on mine! And I appreciate your comment so, so much.

I have an auto-post set for tomorrow, but other than that I'm not sure if I'll post until Tuesday. I am leaving today to go visit my family with Libbie. Have a wonderful weekend! Don't forget to enter the contest! Get one entry by commenting on my post and another entry by commenting on Deborah's!

Helpful Grammar Hints for Bloggers

In one of the great sessions I attended at Blissdom, the topic of how important good grammar and punctuation is on a blog came up. It appears Shannon from Rocks in My Dryer is a grammar-a-holic. I knew I loved her!


I am a copy editor by profession. So please take what follows not as what the general population thinks about your blog but what I and other crazies might think. But really, you don't want some simple punctuation errors to drive someone away from your blog, do you?


I wish they had let me teach a (very) short session on at least proper punctuation at Blissdom. I am honestly not too uptight about poor grammar when it comes to blogging. Many bloggers write the way they speak, and I think as long as you are aware you are putting prepositions at the end of your sentences (as I often do), it's OK. But it does sometime baffle me that even very "big" bloggers make some simple mistakes over and over again.

I was never taught grammar or parts of speech in school, and maybe that's the issue--we have a generation that missed that. I think it was a backlash from too much grammar, too many diagrammed sentences. Perhaps they've gone back to teaching it.

Here are a few simple things that will really polish your writing, and it would make me extremely happy if you could remember just one. If you ever decide to write a book and turn in your manuscript so it follows simple grammar rules (AND USE SPELLCHECK), I promise you will make your editor a happier person. I promise you I see all of these things, and much worse, on manuscripts I get from popular, established authors.

1. Put the period and comma inside quotation marks.

This is probably the most common thing I see on blogs. Please, please, PLEASE try to do this. Even if you are quoting someone else, the period or comma goes inside. Here is an example.

Marlene said, "Let's just be friends," but I wanted more.

Jo-Lynne, who is cute as can be, was around when I was ranting talking about this at Blissdom. I know it can be confusing, but here it goes.

Periods and commas always go inside the quotation mark. Semi-colons and colons go outside. For question marks and exclamation points, it depends on whether they are part of the quotation or not. If it is (like, "What did he tell you?" I asked) it goes inside. If it's not (like, I can't believe he called me "white trash"!) then it goes outside.

2. Please remember the difference between ITS/IT'S, YOUR/YOU'RE, THEY'RE/THEIR, etc.

ITS is possessive, i.e., The book lost its cover.
IT'S is always a contraction for IT IS. It's rainy outside.

YOUR is also possessive. You lost your boots in the rain.
YOU'RE is a contraction for YOU ARE. You're going to wear that?

THEIR is possessive. They lost their boots in the rain. (They must be pretty dumb to all do that!)
THEY'RE is a contraction for THEY ARE. They're running home barefoot because they lost their boots.

3. You do not pluralize with an apostrophe.

This is at least as common as the quotations thing. I think a lot of people just do not know this.

The plural of movie is not movie's, it's movies.
The plural of pony is not pony's, it's ponies.
The plural of something that ends in s is generally that plus an es. Like glass becomes glasses.


I am really not trying to be catty or offend anyone. I just think if people would follow these simple grammar rules, it would bring a new polish to their blogs.

If you have any questions, I'd be happy to answer them. Leave your e-mail (it won't post here), or I will answer in the comments.

The Blissdom Post

It has been an interesting weekend! Thursday I started running a fever and getting a sore throat. Mr. V surmises that I just stressed myself out worrying about Blissdom too much, which is entirely possible. Add to that a mountain of work at the office, and you have one crazy Jessie.

I was running way on adrenaline when I got to the conference on Friday afternoon. I pulled up in my car with my purse, baby, diaper bag, Boppy, AND gym bag with clothes for the cocktail party. I don't know what I would have done if Monica from Writer Chic hadn't come right up to me and said, "Are you Jessie?" It was incredibly providential. We'd been writing e-mails back and forth since before she moved to Nashville but we'd never met. So it was awesome to meet her right away and have someone I kind of knew to find my way around with!

I met so many wonderful bloggers--some I knew/read and many I did not--over the weekend. I just wish I had felt better for the whole endeavor. I needn't have worried about that ridiculous clothing issue! I didn't go to either of the cocktail parties and honestly didn't care what I was wearing once I got there.

I really, really wanted to meet OhAmanda. I've been reading her blog longer than anyone else's almost, and she was the first person I followed on Twitter. Here we are with our cute babies! They are a month apart.

The panels (what I heard of them when I was not out in the hallway with a fussing baby) were wonderful. And I got to bond with some other great ladies in the hallway, so that wasn't too bad either. Can you tell I didn't get to go to much of the photography seminar? LOL. Here is my really bad picture of Arianne, Stephanie, Her Bad Mother, and Rocks In My Dryer.

I was honestly amazed at how many women are really drop-dead gorgeous "in real life." Shannon from Rocks in My Dryer is one of those. I think Stephanie Precourt, also above, is too--I love her bangs. And Mrs. Fussypants, the Queen of Blissdom herself, is just gorgeous. Here she is with her youngest baby boy (she has 5. BOYS. AHHHH!).

So, synopsis. I met lots of cool chicks. I was sick as a dog. I learned some great tools but also that I don't think I want to do the blogging-for-money deal much. I don't have the time or will to put into doing lots of ads and such. I mostly write here to improve my writing. And hopefully provide some interesting thoughts for my "readership."

I love you guys who do read my blog. It makes me feel interesting. And it does prove that everyone's life is interesting if you think about it a certain way. Because really, I can write a lot about sitting on the couch, nursing a baby, and going to work.

Fitting

Coming back from the grocery store on Sunday afternoon, I saw a group of kids hanging around the front of a neighborhood as I drove past. They were all decked out in black, piercings, spikey hair, boots, the work. And yet it struck me how eerily similar they all looked--all boys, all wearing skinny black jeans, pretty much interchangeable.

It's amazing how we want so hard to be different that we end up looking alike! It made me think of my 9th grade school picture. I was wearing my favorite puple and gray plaid "grunge" shirt over a purple baby tee. My hair was nearly blonde from being highlighted so often (looking at that picture is what has kept me from ever dying my hair with permanent dye again). That grunge shirt had allowed me to fit in with my little group in 8th grade...the shirt, the alternative radio station, and a certain love for all things smiley face.

On the first day of 9th grade, I wore that shirt. And I was too afraid to wear my matching puple nail polish, for fear I would seem too weird and NOT fit in with a new group of people. I went to a magnet school for high school, where I think I knew two souls before the first day of my freshman year. After a few days of the new school, I begged my parents to let me go back to my home school. My mom bribed me to stay with an outfit from the Limited.

This has all come flashing back as I've prepared to go to Blissdom this weekend. I don't remember ever being so concerned about what I'm wearing before. It has skyrocketed to the point of ridiculous. I was nearly in tears Monday night as I can't even find a shirt that I think fits well over the lovely nursing rack I got going on.

I spent so many years walking into a crowd of people assuming that everyone hated me unless proved otherwise. A few years of Paxil really helped that! And I feel I am more confident now, more of a woman. And yet the thought of wearing the wrong thing to a little cocktail party is enough to make me want to hide under the covers.

So, Blissdom, I'll probably be wearing the wrong thing. I have no fashion sense. I am lumpy.

But I'm still the same Jessie who writes here. I think I'm a likeable person. I have a great smile that I think attracts people, and I will be wearing an adorable baby who will hide whatever I'm wearing underneath anyway!

It's time to move on.

I Sincerely Apologize to My Husband and Any Other Male Readers

So, darlin', you can just ignore this post.

Please help me.

I am headed to Blissdom '09 next weekend, where I need to make a good impression on a great deal of lovely women bloggers. I will have the baby with me, who is still breastfeeding. The conference involves a day and a half of seminars and two cocktail parties. I can't even get into the issue of how will I change between these events when I don't have a hotel room (perhaps my cousin, Tricia, will let me use hers?).

Problems: I am breastfeeding. I was a 38DD to begin with. This means I am currently gigantuan in the top area. I am also not a small girl (I wear an XL, usually). I am pretty short. I still have extra baby flab in the belly.

How on earth am I supposed to find a cocktail dress? Or do I REALLY need one? Have I mentioned my baby goes to daycare and that is eating up my budget?

If you are or have been a nursing mama, do you have any suggestions for where to find some good nursing clothes? Or what I might wear that I could nurse easily in?

Also, on a sort of related note, I hate ALL my nursing bras. The one I hate the most is the $60 Bravado I bought at the hospital boutique. I need something that has support, a strap that doesn't ride way up, and maybe has a tiny bit of padding to keep the girls covered. Ahem.

Thanks for sticking with me, friends. I need help. (In more ways than one.)