This past Saturday, Mr. V and I invited a few of his fellow teacher-friends over to our (basically unfurnished) house in Chattanooga. He had connected with some of the other new teachers at a conference they all had to go to in July, and he was eager for me to meet them.Being old and married, I had to giggle when the conversation turned to something I am completely unfamiliar with: online dating sites. Apparently there are more than I had ever dreamed of--not only match.com and eHarmony, but also okcupid and plentyoffish and christiancafe, just for starters.
It made me very thankful to be married. Mr. V's friends repeatedly told us that we were very lucky to not have to be dating, and I wholeheartedly agree.
Many, many moons ago, online dating was just a spark in someone's head and meeting people from the Internet almost assured you'd be found somewhere dead, cut into pieces, and stuffed into a shoebox.
Which is why what I am account to you is one of the stupidest things I've probably ever done.
One of my best friends in high school, Cynthia, and I worked together in an aftercare program at the daycare at our church. One day she came in and said that she was going to get together that night with her Internet boyfriend and she wanted me to come along. Her guy would invite a friend for me.
It was a little daunting, but we would drive separately and meet them in a public place, so how bad could it be? Plus I had had a sum total of maybe two dates all of high school. So, I mean, really.
So we went to wherever we were meeting them, and they were going to follow us to the movie theater. Which is when we noticed that one of the tires on my car was nearly flat.
Oops.
So Cynthia and I let them drive and we all went together. In a car. With guys from the Internet. (My dad may kill me for this NOW, 11 years later.)
The sad part is, it was fine. And I really liked the guy they set me up with. And he never called me again.
Not even guys from the Internet liked me.
But now, I'm happily married, and I hope that guy is looking for dates on RednecksConnect or something.
I wonder if, 20 years from now, everyone's parents will have met on the Internet. There won't be as many cute, saw each other across the room stories. But it is interesting, people connecting (somewhat) for personality more than looks. (Maybe? Again, I've never done any online dating site stuff.)
I have to know: Have you ever met someone from one of these sites? Your spouse? Spill!
Internet didn't even exist when we were dating ... early 70s. So here's how I took matters into my own hands.
ReplyDeletePicture it: Christmas 1973. I went to see Santa at one of the local department stores. I sat on his lap and told him I wanted a tall, dark, and very handsome boyfriend. The next month I met Ed, and we married at Christmas 1974. If all else fails ... ask Santa! He delivers!
My husband and I often comment about how glad we are to not have to date in this day and age. I can't even imagine. Although, he says we should sign up for eharmony and see if it sets us up. *eyeroll*
ReplyDeleteI do have two internet dating stories to share- though neither are about me. My roommate in grad school met some boy on one of the dating sites and invited him to our apartment before she had ever met him in real life. I was mortified! You know- the whole chopped up in a box thing! Plus we were two girls living alone in an apartment in New Orleans- it's just not safe to invite strangers in!
On the other hand, we have good friends who met on the internet and are now happily married. On their wedding website they made up a story about meeting at a coffee shop because the family wouldn't have approved. She also left a note on the website to ask the husband "his side of the story," and he would tell people (other than her family) the truth.
My brother found his wife on the internet. He was a really great date-able guy, just too busy flying fighter jets to find his dream girl. And, may I say, he found a nicer, prettier Christian girl than he'd ever brought home before?
ReplyDeleteI think it's a great option for post-college dating especially when neither party likes to hang out in bars.
Meredith
I too feel blessed to be blissfully married and not in the dating game right now. I do not live vicariously through my single friends. They're the ones that have it hard.
ReplyDeleteMy hubby and I know for a fact that eHarmony would NOT match us up and that's pretty hilarious.
Girl, you *know* i've met folks on the interwebs - boyfriends, gal pals, and guy friends.
ReplyDeleteAnd i give a GREAT BIG *eye roll* to all the chopped up in a box nonsense - as made obvious in this post from about a year ago:
http://hopedoesnotdisappoint.blogspot.com/2008/08/connecting-online.html
I met my husband on match.com. I was really worried at first about doing it that way, you hear about the crazy people who are on there) but my aunt and uncle had friends who met there. Since I was new to the area, I decided that I would try it out. There was somethings that I did to be sure he was not crazy that was, meet him in a public place, we talked for about 2 weeks on the phone and then met. We were both living in a new place and I would suggest it to anyone.
ReplyDeleteI think that internet dating is really helpful especially if you are new to a place.
We say the SAME THING every time we see those commercials: "thank the Good Lord we don't have to go through that now". We met at SPACE CAMP, my friend. And it was love at first launch.. hahahah!
ReplyDeleteReally- we were both camp counselors and it's really a breeding ground there! ha!
I met my husband on match.com. At the time we met we lived one block from each other. We never would have met if it hadn't been for match. We certainly didn't travel in the same circles!
ReplyDeleteMy husband and I met on match dot com. We told everyone the truth about how we met, but people still find it a little funny! I met and dated four or five guys on there, and had great experiences...I guess having low to no expectations did the trick!
ReplyDeleteMet my husband on Yahoo Personals and it was great! Went out with a handful of different guys within a week and was super careful about information I divulged, where we met, telling my sister when/where I'd be meeting them, etc. And they were all nice and not scary. But once I met my husband, I knew I didn't want to go out with anyone else. We married in Hawaii 9 months later and are now (2+ years later) expecting our first baby any day now. I would highly recommend it as long as you are super careful with it.
ReplyDelete-Kimberly in NC
knchock at yahoo dot com